Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Year's Eve? Really?

How can it be the end of 2011 already? Didn't I just buy a Highlander (my very first new vehicle I've ever even partly owned)? It can't be over 10 months since we drove it home from the dealership, taking turns on the hour long drive home.

Once upon a time, New Year's Eve was a time to get together with friends, drink prodigious quantities of alcohol, watch the ball drop on TV and just be silly in an adult type of way. Now? Well, I'm sitting at a computer screen typing into the ether (and wondering if anybody will ever start to read my aimless wanderings) while my loving 5 year old and husband play a new Wii game that RP got for Yule from Grandpa and Grammy.


Isn't it wonderful when Daddies and sons play nicely together?


And what are they playing, you might ask? Well, the following pictures might help you to figure that out ... 




The dog is stretched out as far as she can with from her paw-pits/mid-ribs down IN her bed and the rest of her body OUT of her bed.  I can't figure out why she almost never has all of her body in her bed ... usually it's her hips and hind legs in and the rest of her body stretched out in front along the carpeted floor. I don't quite understand her need to only cushion the hind end of her body, but she seems to be happy with it ...



Micah - aka "Professor Fluffybuns" - is stretched out near a dining room chair just preening in his fluffiness and enjoying being a well-fed rescue who is loved and pampered with his very own silly Mastiff to attack, I mean play with. I have no idea where Dylan has hidden himself.


Earlier this week we were visited by Grampa, Grammy, Aunt Annemarie and Tori. This was the first time that Tori has visited our house and the third time I have seen her in person. 


She looks quite a bit like her mommy at this age, with curls she received from both sides of the family. Luckily, RP has learned that his younger cousins are to be treated gently and he's very good with them. Then again, he did get quite a bit of practice with this from playing with his cousin on Daddy's side, Chase.


I just love how much he loves playing with younger kids. After all, there is an age difference between the two that is exactly 2 weeks shy of being 3 years. He also has very little gender "exclusivity with the toys. He very gladly accepted Tori's new "singing teddy bear" to dance with in the Living Room. I am so proud of my little guy!


No Yule visit would be complete without terrorizing Grandpa! It really warms my heart to see my dad playing with his name-sake and really having fun. After having grown up in the military, I didn't get much of a chance to see my dad PLAYING. The joy he takes in RP melts my heart in a way that I just can't put into words. I regret that RP will never know my Mom, but I am very grateful that he gets to know his Grandpa and play with him. My own Grandpa Jones wasn't much for playing with us grandkids the same way that Dad plays with RP. I don't really know why, other than that Grandpa Jones was an only child so maybe he never really learned how to play with kids and then he was a parent during the mid 40's through the 60's so the culture was one in which fathers didn't spend a lot of time playing with their kids.


Well, as another holiday season closes out and the year of 2011 draws down to a close; I have to say that overall it's been a pretty decent year. There have been some ups and downs, but we made it to the end of the year without loss in the family and with our minds almost as intact as they were at the beginning of the year. I hope that 2012 treats the world gently and kindly. For all of my friends and family, I hope that we all enjoy good health (or as good as we can) and joy this coming year. So Mote it Be.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

My Little Man on FaceBook

I wanted to share some of the funnier episodes and conversations I've had with RP. Luckily, with the Timeline profile I can "go back in time" and find some of the funnier things to share here.

March 20, 2009 - thinks it's disturbing for your son to pat your chest and say "I *like* boobs" when he's told to leave them alone.

March 23 2009 - toddler just packed a variety of biscotti and some applesauce in a bag. Nobody knows where he's going ...

May 31 2009 - overheard from Little Man's bedroom after Daddy installed a new window a/c unit and several suspicious beeps: "Stop pushing buttons! Good lord, you've turned it down to 61!"

June 6 2009 - cute quotes (and toddler-mayhem) of the day. When found with a silicone spatchula in the jar of peanut butter ... "I'm PAINTING." When told you don't use peanut butter to "paint" on the fridge .. "But I want to paint..." (said in a very plaintive tone.

August 12 2009 - I made a microwaved lunch. RP came running into the kitchen "I smell something good" and opened the microwave and looked inside. "Where's the food? Where's the food?" as he looked around. I came into the kitchen and he saw me holding the food ... "YOU took the food, Mommy. YOU took the food! I want some, give me that food." Meanwhile, I'm doubled over in laughter.

August 22 2009 - omy ... I'm dyin! RP took a notebook and opened it up. He drew a roughly circular shape on one page and a larger roughly circular shape on the other (facing) page. Then he says "Wait a minute ... this is the little head and this is the big head". I started rolling and my hubby whacked me in the knee.

September 7 2009 - I want to know where Little Man gets his ideas. "I want to do the nekkid polka. I can't do it in underwear. I want my winkie out so I can do it."

September 25 2009 - LM is bouncing off the walls and telling ME to "be quiet so I can concentrate". Then he went and got a squooshy toy and hands it to me and says "You play with this, it's quiet.". OMG - sometimes even through everything he's doing he can be so darn FUNNY!

September 19 2009 - Overheard from the shower:
"I don't want to be wet!"
"Well, I don't want to be bald!"

October 2, 2009 - If you go to feed your cats and have to call out "RP, what did you do with the kitty dishes?" You MIGHT have a toddler/pre-schooler.

October 11, 2009 - overheard from the bath room: "I don't want to get back in. I just want MY SKIN. Can I come out now?" To which hubby replied: "Not without your skin!"

November 30 2009 - Conversations with a 3 yo - the continuing series.
LM "Mommy, what are you doing with that paper?"
Me "I'm going to sand your new step-stool to make it smooth."
LM (throwing himself across the stool) "NO!! I don't want it smooth!! I want it ROUGH!!"

December 10 2009 - I was going potty when I heard a weird sound. I look out the door to see LM tugging his quilt down the hall. I asked him what he was doing. "Don't worry, Mommy. I'm just taking this out so I can live in it in the Living Room."

December 17 2009 - Never ask a 3 yo a question unless you want an honest answer! (ACTUAL conversation)
"Mommy, what did you do today?"
"I went and got medicine. What did YOU do today, sweetie?"
"I played with my winkie."

January 12, 2010 - I have no idea what LM is up to. He has a foam 2" paintbrush and some marshmallows. OMG - he's trying to ROAST THEM on the baseboard heater! I just rescued one and here he comes with a FORK!!!

January 30, 2010 - In changing LM's pull-up we had this conversation: Me " AAAUUUGGHHH!" LM " Don't worry Mommy, it's just a winkie. It doesn't talk." I then proceeded to ROFL

February 28 2010 - Life with a 3 yo: I heard much crying coming from the hall bath and angry tones from Patrick. Finally, I heard Patrick tell the LM to go see Mommy about "it". LM came over to the desk in the LR crying ... with his padded Elmo potty seat around his neck! I forgot to take a picture, but instead removed it after 3 or 4 attempts and kissed his ears since they got scraped.

March 5 2010 - LM brought me a container of coffee creamer. I told him that the pot is empty and he asked me if we have any more "coffee seeds" in the house. I told him yes, so he FORCED me to make a fresh pot of coffee.

April 9 2010 - I told LM he was sweet and smart and strong and then asked him what else? He said "and funny?" So I agreed and funny then I asked what else? He said "and fashionable?" Um ... ok. That came out of LEFT FIELD. WTH has he heard the word FASHIONABLE?

April 25, 2010 - I asked LM if he was handsome and he said yes. Then I asked him why he was handsome ... "Because you are beautiful, Mommy." I ♥ my little guy!

June 16 2010 - Conversations with a 3 yo continued ....
Me - "Why are you nekkid?"
LM - "I don't know!!!"

August 20 2010 - LM quote of the day (as I hand him some underwear and shorts) "Aww ... why do I have to wear clothes?"

August 21, 2010 - You gotta love pre-schoolers!
Me: "RP, that truck does not belong in the chair (recliner, where Daddy was sitting). Put that truck down."
RP: "Never"
Me: "RP, put that truck down"
RP: "Ne-verrrrrr"

September 17, 2010 - "Mommy, my head itches."
"Oh, no!"
"Why did you say Oh No, Mommy?"
"We'll have to take off that head and put another one on!"
"But then I'll BWEEEED! Can't we use head-paste instead?"

September 23 2010 - Me: Are you a person?
LM: No. I'm a boy. Only girls are people.
Me: Are you a human being?
LM: No. I'm a BOY. ...
LM: Daddy is the same boy as I.
Me: I don't think so ... I think Daddy is his own boy.

December 16, 2010 - Um, I found out LM decided to go "commando" today. *shrugs* Oh, well.

February 10 2011 - I was making a hot dog for RP and asked him which bun he wanted - a hotdog bun or a steak samwich bun. He told me "Size doesn't matter, it's what's on the inside that counts." Uh ... I told him to remember that for later in his life just in case he meets a mean girl.

February 14 2011 - Conversations with a 4 year old continued:
RP - "My winkie thinks it's time to watch come TV."
Uh ... I didn't know that thinking with that body part startd THIS young!

May 10 2011 - Aine got a hold of a sugar Easter Egg that Grammy sent to RP. I took it away from her and said "Aine, you don't need a sugar egg." RP then said to me "Does she have DIABETES?"

May 20 2011 - LM just slipped a "Boots" ring from a cupcake onto my finger and said "With this ring, I thee wed."

June 19 2011 - Patrick just told me "You know, it's strange when your 4 yo asks you how your penis is doing this morning." Uh ... um ... RP asks the STRANGEST questions sometimes.

September 13 2011 - RP is perusing the Think Geek catalog. He has already pointed out the giant Angry Bird plush, the r/c tank, a sword on the back cover (that they DON'T SELL) ... My wee geek! Gotta love him!

September 28 2011 - RP decided to wash the evening's dishes. He missed a cup that had had milk in it so I grabbed it, rinsed it out & put it in the sink to wash after we put him to bed. He told me "no, I'll wash it. You just sit back and relax." ♥ ♥ ♥

Dec 20 2011 - Conversations with a 5 yo (after calling Grandma's phone and getting her answering machine)
RP - "It says Grandma's not available, but I know she's there - her car is there."
Me - "Well, honey - maybe Grandma's taking a nap. Or maybe someone came and picked her up and took her somewhere."
RP - "Maybe she was kidnapped!"

Saturday, December 17, 2011

The Never-Ending Present Pile

As I slowly wrap the Yule gifts for our family, I am struck by the fact that the pile is growing and growing. It already is fairly respectable for a family of 3 ... and I am not even halfway done. I still have most of RP's gifts to wrap yet and a few of Patrick's as well.




Have I mentioned yet that one of the reasons I love being a "store" owner is the resources I have for creative gift wrapping? I love going to my supplier's website to see what the latest holiday wrapping paper looks like. The cost per roll is "high" ... but each roll that I buy is 100 FEET of paper so when you get down to how much people spend per roll of comparable paper ... it really is more cost-effective. The average roll of paper is only about 20 - 30 feet so I get more than 3 commercial rolls' worth of paper - and since I like the holographic paper (which usually comes in 15 foot rolls and is more expensive) it works out to more than FIVE rolls' worth of paper on each of my rolls.

Is it true that I only have a WEEK to get everything wrapped and then all my work will be destroyed in just a few days' time? Whew! I'm having a bit of a hard time getting into the spirit of the holidays right now. I'm just too tired and feeling a bit blue and anxious all at the same time. My little guy is keeping life interesting right now - notice that Woody from Toy Story is visiting the Yule village. I have no idea how he thinks he can fit into any of those houses ... though maybe he's there to help maintain the light in our lighthouse.

Friday, December 16, 2011

This Holiday Season

Our Yule tree is up and dressed. It has 300 LED lights, silver tinsel garland (since I have a cat who loves eating string), glass ball ornaments, White House ornaments (compliments of Dad) and Swarovski crystal ornaments plus the ubiquitous candy canes. RP and I got it all pretty a couple of days ago, but now the ornaments are on the move.

Aine is probably the main reason for this migration. Her tail gets going and knocks the ornaments off and onto the ground. RP's solution is to pick the ornaments up and replace them on the tree at a higher location - preferably one that involves him standing on his activity table and reaching across the distance to try to place it as high as he can. Need I mention that this puts him off balance and strikes fear in the hearts of protective mothers everywhere? He is so anxious to grow up (or at least get taller) ... but weren't we all striving to "get older" so we could do more things - until we actually grew up and realized how much responsibility went with growing up?

We also have a Holiday village comprised of 13 porcelain buildings that light up plus one that doesn't, oodles of cordage (2 6-light cords, one single light cord and an extension cord with an on/off button) and a white flannel sheet to act as "snow" and provide cover for the tangle of cords. It has had a fighter jet land in the middle of town, has matchbox cars come in for visits, had an LED "searchlight" (finger LED light) added to the roofline, had "Happy Meal" toys come calling and may eventually have a gigantic kitty marauding through town terrorizing the villagers. Granted, it has no trees or people outside - the giant mutant kitties have a habit of running off with the trees and people so they are safely tucked "inside". I have tried explaining that the village is not a toy, to no avail. All I can do is watch carefully to make sure that nothing actually gets broken.

Another trend this holiday season is RP trying to "ride" Aine. He doesn't actually expect her to walk around with him on her back, but if she is sitting or lying down he hops on and just sits on her. If I needed a demonstration of just how GOOD my puppy is, this would fit the bill. She rarely complains about it, just gives me long-suffering looks (she has to have practiced these while I've been busy or asleep) and tolerates the 46 lb jockey. This leads of course to me saying "RP, get off the dog!" or "RP, you can not ride the dog".

Actually, I think that I am very lucky in the animals that own us. We have a real tree and have yet to extract a cat from it ... this being Micah's first Yule with us we were a little worried about that - Dylan has NEVER tried to climb a Yule tree in his 9 years of life. The tree has never been knocked down - even by the 5 year old human animal I gave birth to. In fact, the only Yuletide funny business has been disappearing village trees and people in the past.

I have all the presents purchased for the variety of holidays my family celebrates - Yule, Christmas, Solstice. They aren't quite all wrapped yet ... I need to get the energy to sit down and do it. I enjoy wrapping gifts ... choosing the paper and which stick-on bow plus the tags makes it a creative experience. I love watching the faces of my family as they open their gifts - it's a very rewarding experience. I have found myself getting more into receiving gifts as the years have gone by. Maybe it comes from a better self-esteem which allows me to feel worthy of gifts.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Why? (a serious subject)

I have never understood why it is so difficult for those of us who suffer from depression to understand it sufficiently to be able to explain it to other people. It is so difficult to explain how depression is sufficient to cause me to be unable to get started in cleaning the house, but not sufficient to block me in an emergency drive out to help a family member. All I do know is that as depression deepens, it becomes more and more difficult to climb out of it enough even to ask for help. When you combine that with the aches and pains of Fibromyalgia and arthritis and psoriatic arthritis and the myriad of other damned things I suffer from and THEN add to it the hell of a migraine which had been declaimed as NOT being a migraine ... let's say that not a whole lot gets done. And the hubby gets sullen and quiet.


At least today I finally convinced my primary care physician that I have been having migraines all along. Not that we can DO anything about it ... I'm on so many different medications that we can't add in Imitrex and Topomax is out of the question even though it would help BOTH the migraines AND the Fibro because it made my white blood cell count go all wonky. The best advice she could give me was Excedrin Migraine ... despite the fact that I'm NOT supposed to take aspirin because of the GERD and Hiatial hernia. *sigh* In addition, for the worsening depression which I finally convinced myself to mention to her she is at a loss on what to do. I'm on the maximum doseage of Cymbalta which is supposed to also help my Fibro and she's not sure whether to ADD another anti-depressant or CHANGE the Cymbalta to something else. I've been referred to a psychiatrist AND a psychologist for this issue. *sigh*


On a lighter note, RP decided this afternoon that he needed to run around the house with no clothes on. This is something that we don't encourage per-se, but we're not against it, either. The funny thing was that my migraine started to act up before we even left the Dr's office so by the time he was running around NEKKID I didn't have the energy to complain. Not even when I decided the best course of action was to go lie down in a dark room and take a nap. So, RP got to nap NEKKID for a change. I love that he feels so comfortable in his skin that he can run around the house nekkid. I love that my husband has not reacted with horror at the idea of his son bouncing around the house with not a stitch of clothing on. (I did tell RP to remove the play clamps from his Dr's kit from his *ahem* winkie since that was a bit disturbing to me) I would be willing to bet that there a lot of kids who would love to able to run around sky-clad in their own house but their parents are horrified by the idea.. Me? Eh ... he'll eventually grow out of it. Gods! I HOPE he grows out of it! I do NOT need to see him running around the house nekkid when he's going through PUBERTY in about 10 years! Now, if he wants to go run around the backyard nekkid at that time after dark, I'm not going to stop him except to caution that we have mosquitos and biting midges and no-see-um's plus poison ivy, oak and sumac and I will NOT be applying anti-itch cream to certain areas. Not even NOW will I apply anti-itch cream to those areas. My responsibility for applying creams to those areas stopped when he was potty-trained!

That's about enough for tonight. It's late and my husband just got home (yay).

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

The Rest of My Family

Now that I've introduced myself, let me pause and introduce the rest of my family. The beings that live in this house besides myself are my son RP who is currently 5 and is ALL boy, our 1 year old Giant Maso Mastiff puppy Aine, our 9 year old half-Bengal rescue kitty Dylan, our 2 year old rescued Ragdoll kitty Micah and my husband Patrick who drives a BIG truck all week.

Let's start off with my husband, Patrick. He and I met online (as it had to be since he's GONE most of the week) and have been married for almost 6 years. He was born and raised in the house just 100 yards down the driveway from where we live in rural Virginia. But he's not your "typical" redneck truck driver. He has a mind that seeks knowledge the same way mine does. He has wit and humor that is twisted in the same way mine is. He's a wonderful daddy, a fantastic husband and he loves us all with a fierceness that I can not describe. He is also a "fuzzy man" ... a big teddy bear who claims his hair is leaving his head in a migration down his back. He makes me laugh and sometimes I make him laugh as well. We try to have fun when the stresses of life allow us to do so. He takes over primary care-giver duties of our son when he's home on the weekends to allow me time to rest. Sometimes this doesn't allow him to get done what he wants to get done on the weekends, especially when a certain 5 year old forces him to play a certain Wii game.


Next, I'll introduce my son. RP stands for Robert Parker. Even before Patrick and I got married we had decided on baby names. Considering that I was 36 at the time, we thought it best to "cover" both sides of the family in one fell swoop; so we decided our first son would be Robert for Patrick's dad and Parker for mine. Now on a side note, Parker is a name that has been passed down in my family for more than 4 generations. My Grandfather was Parker Tefft (another family name) Jr and you can guess what my dad's and brother's names were. My brother - known as Butch since when he was born there were three other Parker Teffts who were living - died at the age of 32 without having a son. I have two cousins who also gave their first sons the middle name of Parker so the generation after ours will continue the name. Back to RP. RP is a wonderful child. He is loving, giving, strong, healthy, gentle when he chooses to be, intelligent, sweet and into EVERYTHING. He started climbing onto the counter by the age of 18 months and started raiding the fridge on his own at about the same time. His vocabulary is astounding to me and some of the things that come out of his mouth are hilarious. Sometimes his logic is "different" but frequently he makes logical connections that would seem to be beyond his years. I suspect that much of this blog will have anecdotes about him and what he says and does.

That brings us to the magnificent puppy in the picture with my child ... Aine. She is a wonderful playmate for RP and already watches over him very carefully. She is a BIG girl already and she still has growing to do. I don't know what species she thinks she is or thinks the rest of us are. But I do know that she is just as much a member of our family as the humans. She is a goofy dog who sticks close to her human "pack members" and loves her best friend, Micah. It never fails to amuse me to see a Mastiff and fluffy kitty playing.


This naturally brings us to Micah. He is a bundle of love, energy, humor and fearlessness wrapped up in a silly poofy body. He is a glutton for both human love and Mastiff slobber. We adopted him from the animal shelter when he was about a tear old and he just fit seamlessly into a crazy household that already had three humans, a puppy and a cranky older kitty. He quickly decided that Aine was going to be his best playmate and allowed her to put his whole head in her mouth while playing.


Last, but not least in my heart, is Dylan. I adopted Dylan as an 8 week old kitten from a different animal shelter. We figured out that he is about half Bengal cat based on his markings. Because Bengals are all part Siamese, he is predominantly a one-person cat. He has not been as welcoming of Aine or Micah, but his "kitten" RP can do no wrong. He used to take turns with another kitty we had at the time in the duty of guarding the kitten from harm ... literally. He may be old and cranky, but he is still my little baby kitty.


So that's the lot of us. There are other characters who will enter this blog, but this is who lives with me day in and day out. I'll leave you with a picture of me that is admittedly out of date just so you can have an idea of who's talking to you. It's not the best picture, but it'll do.


Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Introducing .... MYSELF

Since this is my first blog posting, maybe I should introduce myself and let everybody know a little bit about me and my past. Also, please bear with me as I've never kept a blog in my life.

I am currently 42 years old and have a 5 year old son. Yes, it was a bit late in life to have a child, but I was told from the time I was about 16 that I would NEVER have a child due to some medical issues. I believed what I had been told for almost two decades after that diagnosis before discovering that it was incorrect. Thankfully, I had little problem as a "person of advanced maternal age" getting pregnant with my son. I am truly blessed.

I am a Long-haul trucking "widow. My husband works for a trucking company and is gone from home for most of the week (some weeks he's only home for about 30 hours before leaving for the road again). I also am a person with Fibromyalgia and other chronic medical issues that have rendered me disabled.

I am a Reformed Druid. What this means is that I have taken my hereditary Druidry and my Lakota heritage and merged them into the path that makes the most sense to me. I have family members who are Christian, family members who are Wiccan, family members who are Agnostic and family members who were raised with a Christian/Jewish/Druid background. Becuase my family is so diverse, I respect everybody's beliefs as "this is what makes the most sense TO THEM, so who am I to judge?" I do not "cast spells" - I direct energy in much the same way the Judeo-Christian-Muslim-Buddhist-etc world prays.

I also am a Healer. This means that I direct energies in order to help someone who is sick, hurting, scared etc. I "lay my hands on" people, I direct energies long-distance, I talk to people on the phone or the Internet and I have had enough success to determine that this is one of the duties I have in this life. It is very much similar to being a nurse or physician except that I don't have all the school background that they do. I am just as committed to healing people as they are.

I am hoping that this space will be funny, touching and relevent to other people and not just a forum for me to complain about stuff. But who knows? With the way my life is, it could wind up sounding like a pity-party sometimes.